Number One Son sent this to me as “Redneck Home Security System” but I claim it for Oklahoma.
1. Buy a pair of size 14-16 work boots.
2. Put them on front porch with a copy of Guns & Ammo.
3. Put some giant dog dishes next to boots & magazines.
4. Leave note on your door: “Bubba: Me & Bertha went for more ammo & beer. Back soon. Don’t mess with the pit bulls; they messed the mailman up bad this morning. I don’t think Killer took part; hard to tell from all the blood. I locked all four of ‘em in the house. Better wait outside. Be right back. ~Cooter
Okay… since I’ve started out this morning trashing my state’s reputation it seems like a good time to mention my new guilty pleasure – Animal Planet’s Hillbilly Handfishing. We watched two episodes Sunday night. You probably already know about noodling* and you might know that Oklahoma is one of the few states where it’s legal but did you know that noodling vacations are the latest craze?
Well, maybe not exactly a “craze”. Yet. This guy in southern Oklahoma hosts six guests at a time for a week of noodling. People come from all over the country to do it, even from places where you would think everyone would know better. One of the episodes I watched had two cops from Boston and two ladies from Atlanta. The latter looked way too city-girl for this dubious redneck sport but they were the ones who really got into it. It took the guys from Boston a little longer but they did okay. The only person who got freaked out about it was a young woman from Oklahoma City. She and her husband were newlyweds and he talked her into it. It would be interesting to see how that couple is doing in ten years.
Anyway, what is it about all this redneck stuff that’s so fascinating? It’s all over cable. That’s probably just because rednecks work cheap and they love to show off. And we keep watching. Well… at least I do. Until there’s something good on Siffy. (a.k.a SyFy)
*Interestingly. Noodling seems to be growing in popularity. Several years ago when Mike Rowe went noodling for an episode of Dirty Jobs it was legal in only three states. Now, according to Wikipedia, it’s legal in eleven states. Could it be that this is all Mike’s fault?
August 25th, 2011 - 11:16 am
“‘Redneck Noodling’: still less creepy than ‘Toddlers and Tiaras.’”
I’m not a big fan of “reality” shows anyway, but at least the noodling one features adults who are reasonably aware that they may be mocked or belittled on television.
(That said: most of my students – many of them native Oklahomans – think noodling is crazy dangerous.)
August 26th, 2011 - 7:19 am
Absolutely! I’ve only seen the commercials for Toddlers and Tiaras but that was more than enough. It creeped me out even when I had only seen the title in the TV listings. And now there’s another one along those lines: Dance Moms. It makes me want to go hug my mother and thank her for my simple life.
August 26th, 2011 - 9:13 am
The other thing that makes me twitch about those shows is how the young ladies that are on them will turn out as adults. I deal with enough people with inflated ideas about their own importance and entitlement to things not to want any more people like that in the world.
August 27th, 2011 - 6:16 pm
I am sometimes envious of rednecks and the reality show folks. They seem to be blissfully unconcerned with how others see them. Maybe that’s why so many rednecks end up on reality tv.
August 29th, 2011 - 6:12 am
I watched Hillbilly Handfishing again last night. What fascinates me about it are the people who want to try it. Some of them are so unexpected.