I wonder what’s so jolly about Jolly Ranchers. If I was going to assign an emotional state to these candies it would probably be something more like “forlorn.” That’s making the (probably weird) assumption that if they could actually feel any emotions they would want to fulfill their purpose in life, which is to be eaten and enjoyed.

Sometime around Halloween Number Two Son brought home a big jar full of candies of different kinds. They all disappeared rather quickly except for four little unloved Jolly Ranchers. We all ate a lot of Jolly Ranchers but those last four were just four too many I guess.

A couple of weeks before Christmas when I bought some “soft” peppermints and some Hershey’s kisses to put in the jar the last four Jolly Ranchers were still there so I left them and put all the Christmas candy on top of them. A couple of days ago we finally finished all the Christmas candy (It lasted a lot longer than I expected.) and those four Jolly Ranchers are still sitting there in the jar. Unloved. Unwanted. Forlorn.

It’s not that I don’t like Jolly Ranchers. They’re good, really. It’s just that they don’t call to me, if you know what I mean. They don’t tempt me. They don’t make me think, “Oooooo! I can’t resist.” Not like chocolate, or those peppermints. I suppose eventually I will eat them, if no one else does, just because I’m tired of looking at them. Poor little things.